Jackalope convo amongst friends

28 Feb

Kimmie: His name is The Ripper

HB: Good name- he looks all sweet and innocent but really he’ll rip your ass apart.

Kimmie: Exactly: Jackalope the Ripper will gut you like a trout.

HB: I’d like to say Bonita only looks mean and  really, she is sweet as pie…she”s not. She will fuck a Bitch up.

Kimmie:I’ve already fashioned a necklace for him- it goes with his fur and makes him appear laid back and totally not a rabbicidal maniac or bunnicidal maniac.

HB: Awesome, Bontita needs something too…just need to think

Kimmmie: She needs bling-I have something for her.

HB: Does it say- touch my cupcakes and I cut you. BITCH! Have a nice day

Kimmie: Nope, but it’s diamonds.

Kimmie: You can make her a tiny painted sign.

HB: Well any well respected bitch from the ghetto of Timbucktoo, needs diamonds.

HB: I plan on doing photos tonight.

Kimmie: LOL! I want to take him home to pet and admire but I know he would get in a fight with Jethro

HB: I need at least 3 more of these. A litter- perhaps Bonita and JR can mate.

Kimmie: Yes! They can have baby giraffes and little fox friends too.

HB:Cause jackalopes are magical and they can reproduce any animal in the world.

If you read our blog, you will know we have wanted, , needed a jackalope. Imagine our excitement when we saw them at the store we were at, sold them!! It was like Christmas day, Easter, and our birthday’s wrapped in one. Even better, to where we were screaming like a 13 yr old seeing Justin Bieber, we saw jackalope heads HANGING ON THE WALL!!!!! We both immediately started texting family to let them know we have found them. I have now started a campaign to receive a wall mount jackalope as my 30th birthday present. It believe that it has magical powers that will make me feel better about turning 30.

 

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KIMMIE  :  It was truly magical – my heart made a silent “squeee” sound when I spotted the mini-jackalope display on the shelf – I thought I was going to die with joy………..AND THEN I SPOTTED THE BIG ONES MOUNTED ON THE WALL and I had to contain myself for fear of having a “Price-is-Right OMG i’ts a NEW CAR” moment.  I was like “AH!!! LOOK TAMI – THEY HAVE THE BIG ONES ON THE WALL!!!” and we grabbed each other and made happy noises and murmured “We totally need one – I have to have one – I’m getting one – someone needs to buy me one of those” under our breaths while walking out of the store and texting our families frantically to alert them that jackalopes have been spotted in Spokane.

We had to buy ourselves the mini jackalopes to satisfy our lope-lust enough to get out of the store – there was no way we would have made it back to work otherwise.  Our co-workers ranged from slightly amused to bewildered and frightened of our joyful showing off of the jackalopes – nobody gets it like me and HB – they don’t understand the magic of the alopes.  I think it’s a good social test to find out if someone is cool or not – just ask “Jackalope – totally awesome – yes or no?”  If they don’t say yes immediately they are lame and won’t get most of our jokes.

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